Category: Uncategorized

  • :)

    I’m cautiously pumped about this new horror flick, which just premiered at Fantastic Fest here in Austin and officially opens nationwide this weekend: Starring Kevin Bacon’s daughter and with a supernatural plot centering around trauma, the film is getting mostly favorable reviews. Seems it might be a good way to kick off our happiest month […]

  • Irregular Holes

    Trypophobia — the fear of random, irregular holes — is a new one to me. I heard about it recently on Glow Up, the British Bake-Off of makeup competitions. According to the leading authority on the pathology (cited below), “some sufferers start to cry or become very aggressive when encountering clusters on holes like lotus seed, […]

  • Skeletor: A Biography

    Long before he donned the infamous purple hood to torment He-Man, Skeletor was a real flesh-and-blood human being. Allow me to explain. Masters of the Universe artist and toy designer Mark Taylor created Skeletor based on a childhood memory of a California haunted attraction called “Laff in the Dark.” There, young Mark saw a mannequin, […]

  • Egregious

    I spotted quite the glaring error on a decoration from At Home this week: And their website version of the product contains the same misspelling! You need to tighten up, “At Hme.”

  • Neologism Alert

    Merriam Webster just officially added the term pumpkin spice to the dictionary, solidifying Starbucks’s reputation as a lexical influence on the English language and inching them one step closer to world domination. As if we didn’t already know, the word means “a mixture of usually cinnamon, nutmeg, ginger, cloves, and often allspice that is commonly […]

  • IYKYK

    Recent purchase and the absolute BEST way to light a fire. You can probably guess the movie reference! 😉

  • Season of the Bitch: Oh Hell Gnome

    Welcome to the blog’s first “Season of the Bitch” op-ed! In posts like these, I will express my seething contempt for what I perceive to be seasonal offenses. (However, I harbor no ill will toward people who hold a different opinion.) I sense that my readers will unanimously agree with me on this rant, so […]

  • Your 2022 Mixtape

    Let’s get this party started! And what better way to set the mood than a playlist of seasonal tunes? Below is a link to this year’s hand-picked, Skeleton-Key-recommended mix on Spotify! It includes 68 minutes of creepy, groovy, haunted music to serve as your soundtrack for the season. Great to have on in the background […]

  • The Candy Corn Solution

    If you’re one of the many people who either hate or are “meh” on candy corn, TRY THIS. Like seriously: close your laptop and go buy plain salted peanuts and a bag of autumn’s most polarizing pseudo-vegetable. Mix that sh*t together and eat a handful. It’s a game changer.

  • The Time Is Nigh!

    It’s finally September. You know what that means: The Skeleton Key returns! Thank you for joining me as I geek out about Halloween for 1/6th of the year (Sept. 1 through Nov. 1). This blog is my virtual celebration of the season, an outlet for my overflowing enthusiasm for our favorite holiday. My hope is […]