Remember that quirky Brookstone knockoff catalog you see on airplanes? The one that sells high-tech (but somewhat low-brow) inventions like these?

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And wildly unique gifts like these?

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Three available!! One for every Maroon 5 fan on Earth.

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With the same ubiquity as Bibles in cheap motel nightstands, Skymall magazine can reliably be found in the seat pockets of most every U.S. airplane. Right next to the airsickness bags.

And guess what? Right now they have Halloween products.

Here is a smattering of their October offerings online.

Martian-tini, anyone?

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Not just for Halloween! Also perfect for pre-teen boys’ bedrooms everywhere!

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I legitimately like this giant lawn spider web.

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And this grim reaper wall sculpture.

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My favorite product might be this pewter figurine of a skeleton reclining in an open casket.

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But hilariously, Skymall decided to spin the product as a “catch-all dish,” lest it seem like a frivolous purchase devoid of usefulness. And they did so by ‘Shopping some purple accessories into the image. (Thank goodness. I finally have a place for my purple Tic Tacs!)

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I’m still undecided as to whether “Resing” is a misspelling of “Resting” or of “Resin.”

Keep the myth alive in your neighborhood with this peeping Sasquatch!

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Or any of these other Bigfoot-related products (which are legion … and often strangely not categorized in the site’s Halloween section).

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Two questions: 1. Do you need a costume? and 2. Are you a Poison fan??

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Shirt includes tattooed arms, white graphic tee, vest, and chest hair. Note: The product description is quick to remind potential buyers that the shirt “works great as an everyday shirt to stand out from the crowd.” (I’d say that depends on the crowd.)

I leave you with the inexplicable 30-inch “Tasmanian Devil Statue,” which is featured on the front page of the “Halloween Decor” section of the website … because it looks like a massive subway rat, I guess?

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And let’s be real: on what other holiday can they push this thing?

Thank you, Skymall, for reminding us that Halloween is the holiday when truly anything goes.

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2 thoughts on “Skymall-oween

    1. Hahaha! Yes. Truly, that sumo table would look good in any room and match any decor. =] Thanks so much; glad you enjoyed the post!

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